So when I select an instance in the DAW (cubase 12 pro) it seems VEpro7 loads in another instance and the one I selected is renamed to the one it randomly chose.  Seriously weird.

Edit - I'll try to explain:

In server, I create 2 instances - Effect vst Seventh Heaven reverb and vst HD Cart reverb on the other.

In DAW, I add 2 VEpro7 tracks.  On on track I connect to seventh heave, on the other i connect to HD Cart.  All is well.

I disconnect both of them.

after disconnecting, if I try to connect the one that was connected to 7th heaven, to HD Cart, it will connect to 7th heaven (even though i selected hd cart) and now that it says connected to 7th heaven, looking at the server, the HD cart instance is gone - there are now 2 7th heaven instances.

Hope that's understandable.